Goal Acheived. True Love Denied

Well, Interdweeebs. I know it's been awhile, but it's time for your faithful mistress of the dark chocolate eclair to leave you all. Yes yes, I kno, but hold back those tears mon amies. This Is a good thing, you see after the depression from my spikey haired anime love child dumping me i locked myself in a closet for three weeks with nothing to eat. and I HAVE NEVER LOOKED BETTER!

I have learning a whole bunch of lessons on my love quest. Like eating only ice chips will land you in hosiptal. Craigslist's missed connections should sometimes stay missed! Eating only cabbage for 7 days will eventually make you shit and throw up at the same time. Love can't be forced. And I have to love myself before I love someone else. And no one will truely love you until you under 98 pounds.

Which is why I bid you all a fond adieu, adeiu adeiu adeiu to you and you and you. But before I leave I've heard about this new diet where they insert a carniverous ring worm directly into your rectum. Do y'all think i should try it? I need to look smoking hot for when I do meet Mr Right (not Mr. Right Now In The Alley!!! LOL!). Or even Mr RightNow really, or possibly that cute guy who greets people at wal-mart. Do you think he's single?

You see how much I think about love?! FRUSTRATING! I am never going to find love if I dont stop thinking about it. I am thinking of new hobbies like dancing in a dance marathon or running more than twice a day or seeing if I can do 1000 sit ups during an episode of Everyone Loves Raymond.

So from this point on I am not thinking about love, or blogging, or anything else other than me- good ol' single leslie.

Leslie OUT!

ps. If anyone knows of any available men, email me at wildthinglover@gmail.com. I mean, afer i've learned to love myself, of course.